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Sex, Love, and Addiction


Aug 17, 2023

Dr. Rob continues his discussion with Jay and Larry, two men in recovery, to help people understand that addiction is a lot more complex than it seems on the surface. The opinion you have of yourself can keep you stuck in destructive patterns. It’s so important to consciously put yourself in healthy and positive environments, like in a recovery or group program, if you ever wish to break free from the power of addiction.  

 

TAKEAWAYS:

[2:00] Larry had this internal dialogue going through his head, “This is just who you are.”

[3:20] Larry’s wife found out about him acting out at least 4-5 times. He shares how it completely tore her about. 

[6:55] Larry didn’t realize all of his lies were causing his wife PTSD. 

[7:25] If there was anything that Larry could change, it would be to tell the truth and to tell it faster. 

[8:45] Jay was living in a fantasy world and he didn’t realize it was destroying the people who loved and cared for him. 

[13:05] Why did Jay go to a residential program? Wasn’t group therapy enough? 

[15:45] Jay was able to prove through actions that he was taking his recovery seriously. 

[18:00] Larry’s experience with Dr. Rob was life changing. 

[22:15] Mentorship is a very important piece to recovery. Jay has taken this on as part of his recovery and healing journey. 

[24:00] When you lose trust with the people you love, then you lose what really defines the relationship. 

 

RESOURCES:

Sex and Relationship Healing

@RobWeissMSW

Sex Addiction 101 

Seeking Integrity

Cruise Control: Understanding Sex Addiction in Gay Men 

Prodependence: Moving Beyond Codependency

Out of the Doghouse by Robert Weiss

 

QUOTES:

  • “What other people don’t know won’t hurt them; is probably the biggest lie in addiction.”

  • “I would think I was telling the truth, but I wasn’t. I’d change a slight detail.”

  • “A residential program accelerated my recovery. I was surrounded by people who were experts in the field and at the same time I had peers who made me feel safe.”