Nov 7, 2023
Speaker A: This is the rock solid relationships podcast. Making friendships that last. An interview with Chelsea Winterholler and Lynn Yule. Ready to create rock solid relationships with the people that matter most to you. You are in the right place. My name is Sarah Payne, and I'm a master. Certified relationships coach. And each week, I teach you how to create the connection and love that you desire because you know that the quality of your life is directly related to the quality of your relationships. I'm so glad you're here. Hey, friends. I have an exciting podcast for you today, so let me just give you a little bit of background. I have a couple of dear friends. We all live in different states now, but we met when we all lived in Montana, and Lynn still lives in Montana, and Chelsea lives in Washington, and I live in Colorado. But we have really kept in touch and even become closer than ever as we have become better friends, even as we've lived far away. And we decided we want every woman in the world, every person in the world, to have a friendship like the kind of friendship that we have with one another. And so we decided to record a podcast about it, and we did. And Chelsea kind of leads the discussion. And you can find her she's also a life coach. You can find her on Instagram at Winter Hauler Coaching if you're interested. She helps moms embrace their children's future without fear, and you can find her there. But I think you'll really enjoy this podcast and just the insights that we've gleamed about friendship from being such dear friends with one another. And I know that that's something that I coach my clients on often. It's just like this desire to find lasting friendships that are meaningful. And we believe, all of us believe, that you can do that no matter where you are. That it's not this magical thing that we have that nobody else has, that it's something that's available to all of you. And we, in this podcast talk about how to do that. You can also, if you're interested in finding more about Chelsea, aside from her Instagram handle, you can find her at Embrace Relief with Chelsea Winterholler on any podcast, like, wherever you listen to your podcasts. So I really hope that you enjoy this episode and that you gleam some insights into your own friendships and into how to make even more amazing friendships. Thanks for listening.
Speaker B: Well, hello, ladies. We are going to talk about friendship today. I am so excited. Why don't each of us kind of introduce ourselves? Do we need to? Do I? Let's start with Sarah. She is really good at introducing herself, so if we let Sarah go first, then I think both follow.
Speaker C: Yeah.
Speaker B: Lyn and I will feel better about the situation. So go ahead, Sarah.
Speaker C: Awesome. I'm Sarah Payne. I'm a master certified relationships coach, so I help. Women love being married. And I am a mother of four and I'm married to Ryan. We've been married almost 18 years. So, yeah, I'm super excited to be here. And I met both of these wonderful women when we all lived in Montana together. And I now live in Colorado.
Speaker B: Awesome. Montana. Best state ever. All right, Lynn, who are you?
Speaker D: Well, I'm Lynn Yule. I am a nurse, a registered nurse. I've met you guys really? Through our church, obviously. Right. And then while we lived here in Montana. But I am married to Jason. We've been married for 21 years, you guys. I know. Isn't that crazy? Yeah. But I am not as adept at, like, podcasting as you people are, so I will yeah, do my best.
Speaker B: Which is why we are so excited. Lynn's going to freshen it up a little around here. And Lynn loves to camp in her super killer Airstream. And my husband's so jealous that you own one.
Speaker D: Oh, my gosh. It's the cutest thing ever. We love it.
Speaker C: Yes.
Speaker D: Sometimes I just go sit out in like I just love her.
Speaker C: Oh, yeah.
Speaker B: What's her name again? Does she have a name?
Speaker D: Bambi.
Speaker B: Bambi.
Speaker C: Yes.
Speaker B: I love it. Awesome. And I am Chelsea Winterholler. And I am also a life coach. I help moms help their kids face their fears around their future. So any unsure things that are going on in your future, I help you work on that. And I am also married. Not for 21 years, but I guess I'm getting closeish to that. I have three boys and we just do all the sports. That's great. I love it. So by day, I'm a life coach, by night I'm a chauffeur. That's what I would say. So Sarah and Lynn and I are just we seriously we have created this intense level of friendship that we want to teach all of you to create. Because I totally well, we've talked about this. We all believe that it's totally available to anyone. So the past few weeks, we've kind of been taking notes on the things that are unique about our friendship and we just want to talk about it and share it. So first thing that I want to go with is expecting something from a friendship versus choosing to connect. What does that mean to you guys? Why did we think that this was one important thing in our friendship? Like not coming in, expecting anything from each other?
Speaker C: Hoko. I think it's important because when I expect things from you, like I expect you to answer my text or my Marco Polo within a certain amount of time, then it immediately just puts me on guard. Kind of like, you better prove yourself to me kind of situation versus when. I wouldn't say I don't have expectations for either of you. Maybe I have some assumptions or I'm sure they'll get back to me type of thing, but when I drop those expectations, then I'm just able to love you both instead of putting you on this. It's almost like in the past, they better prove themselves to me that they are worthy, being a certain level of friendship. We see this on social media a lot, right? And in pop psychology, people will show you who they are, and when they do, listen to them. And I think there's wisdom in that. But I also think I don't really want to be entering the important relationships in my life with that kind of mentality. It's just exhausting.
Speaker B: Yeah. Even Sarah, when you said that the assumption, so you said Marco Polo. We Marco polo. All the and tell people what that.
Speaker C: Is, just in case they don't know what that is.
Speaker B: Oh, my gosh. If you don't know what it is, join the Earth. But just a virtual platform where you send videos back and forth, but you can send it at any time, and then the person can reply whenever they want. So as we talk on there, when you said that there was a assumption or you assume that we'll get back to you at some point, and even yesterday, lyn sent a Marco Polo, and I watched it, and I didn't reply. And Lynn, were you thinking, like, she hates, obviously. Oh reply?
Speaker D: No. I mean, I think that that's, like, the beauty of this relationship, our friendship that we've created. I feel like I don't even put a label on our friendship. I don't say we're best friends. Do you know what I mean? To me, there's no label with our friendships. And so then whatever manual, I don't feel like it was written beforehand. I feel like it's been created through our interactions. When nobody responded back to me yesterday, it's just like there's no personal I didn't feel, like, flighted or whatever. Do you know what I mean? It wasn't like, oh, they don't care. They're not responding. It was just like, we're busy, and we'll get back to each other when the time is right, if that makes any.
Speaker B: So well, it's just so interesting. I love that you said the manuals being created, like, right now. What if we Sarah master relationship coach? What if that was every relationship in your life? That you're just creating the manual as you go versus expecting everything because of past experience?
Speaker C: As Lynn was talking too, I just recognized another thing that we do that I think is really useful for our friendship number. I remember growing up and my mom, with the best of intentions, she would always say, like, three girls can't get along. You either have to have two, which I think that's terrible advice, and it was well meaning, and it's just not true. But also, as you were talking, like, oh, we just have such an expansive, abundant view of each other's. Don't I literally spend zero time thinking, like, is Lynn closer with Chelsea than she is with me, or does Chelsea like Lynn better than she likes I. And I recognize that you probably talk to each other outside of our three way Marco Polo conversation, and I think that that's amazing. Right. And just before we hit record, Lynn, who is the only one of us that still lives in Montana, was telling us both about how she's going to get together with a friend later on today that Chelsea and I both know and they're going to, like, spend some time and, like, I felt zero. Like, I think I thought, I wish I were there. I want to be there. But there was no, like, well, lyn better not become as close to this friend as she is to, like, careful what you share with. Like, none of that. And it sounds silly when we say it out loud, but we feel those things. Right. But in my mind, I'm just like, oh, yeah, the more love that Lyn has for other people, the more love that Chelsea has for other people, the more that it's going to come back to me.
Speaker B: And I will say I feel that in other relationships. Like, oh, look at they're being friends with not they must not like me. That difference, you think? That's what I was going to say. Sarah so, Lynn, what do you think is the difference there between our relationship versus some of those other ones? I might feel less than just okay.
Speaker D: Like, I was thinking of the book, like, not being invited to the book club or finally being invited to the book club and then realizing that all of these people that I thought were my friends were already a part of it. And why didn't they invite you?
Speaker C: Years.
Speaker D: Yes. And why didn't they invite me? And so I totally felt in that moment not a part of the group. Right. But then my connection with those people is so different from my connection with you guys. Like, I feel like my connection to you is born out of love and my connection to them is born out of almost, like, societal. Right. Like, you're a part of this group. I want to be a part of this group. You seem to be like, I don't know if that makes any sense. I don't know. Do you know what I mean?
Speaker C: It's like a relationship of convenience or.
Speaker D: I'm just on the outside of the group looking in versus being on the inside of that group. I don't know if that makes any sense.
Speaker B: Yeah. When you said that, I think there's that version of how we started. This was like, what do we expect from people? Right. And why do we expect those things? And then who we choose to connect with? Because it truly is a choice. Like, we invest a lot of time in one another and in our very personal lives. Like, I choose to be invested in your life and those people, typically, that I'm feeling jealous of or that I'm feeling not included. Like, I don't know that I'm investing in connecting with them fully.
Speaker C: Like, they're not my friends on Marco Polo.
Speaker D: Right. And I would say that that is accurate because it's almost like when we're connected, you feel our connection. It's almost like I can feel my heart, like, connecting to you. Does that make any yeah, like, in those instances, it's a little bit more superficial. I would say.
Speaker B: No.
Speaker C: Would you say you're more guarded?
Speaker B: Sorry, go.
Speaker C: Sarah, would you say you're more guarded, too, Lynn? Like, you're just less likely to open up.
Speaker D: Oh, for sure. And I'm not sure what I can it's like, well, I'm not sure if I share this completely personal experience, will I be judged? Will I be that different of so.
Speaker C: Can we talk about that whole, like, the J word? Yeah, I think we worry about that so much. Like, well, these people will judge me. I can't share myself with them. And we've talked about this before. Like, well, one of the reasons that we are so close is we don't judge each other. But then I was like, no, I judge you guys all the.
Speaker B: Yes.
Speaker C: It's not that because I have thoughts about you and how you live your life all the so what's the difference?
Speaker B: I think the difference in yeah, like lyn said, judging with oh, and this is what we talked about is that I can judge you all want, but your choices don't impact me. And so I'm like, oh, why would Sarah buy that car? Like, that car is so ugly. What is she thinking? She's thinking about buying a really ugly car. That's why I'm doing like but it doesn't impact me, so her choices don't affect me at all. So then I feel like, oh, I'm able to love you anyway. I can judge you and love you at the same time because it doesn't impact me. No, I think that's true.
Speaker C: And then I also think all three of us get to a space fairly quickly where we realize those judgments are about us, they're not about the other person. Right. So then you might be like, okay, Sarah, tell me why you want to buy a Rivian. Because I think they're ugly, but I want to want to understand why you don't think they're ugly. Right.
Speaker D: Yeah.
Speaker C: I remember recently, I recommended a book to all of you, and Chelsea was like, I'm loving this book. It's so good. And lyn got on it. She's like, I don't really get like it seems kind of dumb and superficial. She didn't say, like, that. She was much more tactful than that. But I remember initially totally judging Lynn and being like, what's her problem? This is the best book ever. And then, like, recognized my own judgments, and I was like, I want to know what Lynn thinks about this book that's different than what I think about this book. And maybe I can share some of the reasons I love it. And also, if she doesn't love it, that's fine, whatever.
Speaker B: Yeah. We genuinely want to know what each other is thinking and why, what's behind it.
Speaker D: Well, and I think that goes to we have a high level of respect for each other and what we choose to share with one another. And I don't know, just like in who we? Right. Like, when Sarah recommends a book, it's because she was impacted by it. Right. And we trust Sarah, and we trust her. I don't know her recommendations or think I don't know with just anyway, I don't know where my dog was.
Speaker C: I think there's for sure, like, safety in our relationship, but I don't think the safety comes because there's a lack of judgment. No, the safety comes because we all like it's almost like we take extreme ownership over our feelings, at least. Speaking for myself personally, I trust that all of you are going to love me even if you disagree with me. I don't know, what do you all think about that?
Speaker D: I think that that's true. Don't you think that that's true? And that comes from our experiences of just that happening. Right.
Speaker B: It's come from us showing up. Right. Like, actually proving it. Proving like, we're going to be here for you and we're going to love you no matter what. I mean, we go through a lot more than not liking each other's books or the car that each other chooses. We've been through or in the middle of health issues, family issues, relationships. I mean, real deep, deep struggles. I see tears in eyes, and I think that, like, being there through it and not running away when it gets hard, that creates that respect that Lynn and the respect that Lynn is talking about and the trust that Sarah's talking about, that we're here, we're in it.
Speaker C: So if someone's listening and thinking, like, I want, like, what's the formula?
Speaker D: What is the formula?
Speaker B: I one thing that I would say is part of the formula is that you get to create it if you want it. I think having that belief, first and foremost, is that, no, I can create this type of friendship and really putting it out. Yeah. Really, truly believing it.
Speaker C: Yeah. I totally agree, because I think I've coached women on this before where they were just like, I don't believe that there are women out there that will have deep connections with I'm like, well, then you're not going to find it. They're everywhere, though, if you believe that.
Speaker D: They're everywhere.
Speaker B: For sure.
Speaker C: Choose who you like. I don't want to have this kind of relationship with everybody. I don't want to share my deepest, darkest secrets with everybody. But as I think about each of you, I'm like, what attracted me to Chelsea and and like, there were specific things, like, wanted more of in my.
Speaker B: Life that you both.
Speaker C: Then and then believing that that is out. Like, you don't have to have that relationship with everyone. You don't have to have that relationship with the members of any given book club, but you can have it with it's available to you. We're meant to be connected to one another.
Speaker B: And then my thought as you're saying that is like, yeah, but it's hard and it's going to take a long time. Right.
Speaker C: Really take that long, though.
Speaker B: Well, that's what I'm saying. Like so natural. I can just hear people thinking like, well, yeah, this is going to be so hard to do that and it's just going to take so long.
Speaker C: You know what? I think it's way harder. Oh, sorry Lynn, I'm going to cut you off.
Speaker D: Go ahead.
Speaker C: It's way harder to live your life.
Speaker D: Believing each other, right. And I think the fun of it is, even if it did take long, the fun is in learning about each other and connecting with each other and having experiences that you enjoy together. And I think of you both, right, over the years, all of the different ways in which we've connected, from very small juices, right, chelsea and small conversations and sitting by one another in a new experience or whatever, just from all of those little things. That was fun, right? Like, getting to know each other and finding those connections. And then it's easy to build on that. Does that make any sense? So if it does take a while or if it doesn't take a while, either way, the process can be an enjoyable process.
Speaker B: It totally does. And I think as you invest in your relationship and prioritize each other and it might be something you have to learn. You might have to learn and teach yourself. Like, how do I prioritize a relationship? I don't even know what that looks like. But the way that you figure out what it looks like for you is just start doing it. Set an alarm in your phone, like every other day at 07:30 p.m.. That's like, don't forget to check on Sally.
Speaker D: Right?
Speaker B: That can be what it looks like. If you desire to have a relationship with someone, it can be you just showing up until they figure out how awesome you are and they start showing up too.
Speaker D: Okay.
Speaker B: I love this idea that what we believe about one another, we also believe about ourselves. So I'm just going to say some things that I believe about you guys. And then you can give me your thoughts. So they love me no matter what. They see the best in me, they will forgive me, right? Maybe I want what's best for you also. What do those thoughts make you think? Those are things I believe about you.
Speaker C: I love that you believe that about me. And then I concur. I'm like, yes, I feel the same way about all of you. You both give me so much grace. And you see in me potential that I can't always see in myself. And as I think about how the because for those listening, we weren't like this super bestie club when we lived in Montana. We've actually become so much closer since we moved, I would say through the gift of technology. And I was listening to a podcast recently on relationships and it said it takes 200 hours to develop a deep and abiding friendship. And I was just like, that is a lie. I don't think it takes that long at all. I guess it could, but it doesn't have to. It really doesn't. You can forge lasting friendships in one conversation.
Speaker D: I would totally agree with that. But I think it's all in what you share in the conversation. Right. It's really at the core of being vulnerable. I feel like that's truly like there's so much vulnerability in our friendships with one another and I feel like that is the crux of our connection.
Speaker B: I not long ago heard that being vulnerable is being courageous. Like, that they just are the exact same word. And I wholeheartedly agree with that because it takes a lot of courage to be vulnerable, to open up to people. And Sarah, as you said, that we became closer after we moved away. I think one reason is because we have had a rough couple of years and when we all lived together, we.
Speaker D: Were doing a lot of like we.
Speaker B: Were kind of coasting and things were going okay. And when what's it called when this stick hit the road? I can't think of when the rubber hit the road. When hard things happened in my life and hard things started happening in Lynn's life and hard things started happening in your like you need people. And so we became this vulnerable pod that was like, this is happening and I am expressing myself like our friendship has been forged through hardships more than through when we were fluffing in the clouds.
Speaker C: I've never totally made that connection. But as you were talking about all of that and I was thinking about the things that both of you are going through and that I'm going through and it makes me so grateful for my trials because you're right, we've needed each other more and that's really sacred.
Speaker B: That is really beautiful. I don't know if I still want the trials, but no, I agree.
Speaker C: The way you develop that without them.
Speaker B: Yes, I think you still can get close to people. Even if you feel like your life's going great, that's through. That just prioritizing and starting with the juice. Like if we hadn't started with the little things like Lynn met me and my kids and Lyn doesn't have kids. She met me and my kids in the park like multiple times, probably against her and but that's where it started was just those simple moments, for sure.
Speaker D: And I would say it wasn't comfortable at first to start. It's never comfortable at first to start hanging out with somebody new. Right. It does feel awkward. It feels a little weird, like you really sometimes don't want to go. Right. You have to choose to want to create or to at least try to create new friendships and to allow the awkwardness yeah.
Speaker B: Choose to want to create it. I love that it feels like a tongue twister, but I like it. I also think there is a level of empathy that we hold for one another because I don't understand some of your trials, because they haven't been mine. But I have to choose consciously to try to understand and to be there and love through it and feel it as much as I can without it.
Speaker C: That's like, such a gift that you give your friends, right? Instead of like, come on, you shouldn't be feeling this way to just be like, I'll sit down with you in the mud right now. I haven't been in this mess before, but I'm going to imagine with you for just a minute what that might feel like.
Speaker D: And I think that that, again, is, like, such vulnerability. I remember, Sarah, when, like, had, like, my eggs wouldn't grow and failed IVF and you brought me flowers and you just sat with me in sadness, and I didn't need to feel better for you to feel better. You could just be sad with me.
Speaker C: Yeah. We think that we're trying to make the person feel better by offering them whatever. Oh, Lynn, you don't want kids anyway. They're like the trial of a whatever, insensitive thing I could have said that I'm sure I have said before. Instead, it's like, no, I'll just be with you right now and for as long as you need me to. And then on the flip side, I think we all show each other grace. But you in particular, Lynn, you show so much grace. When I put my foot in my mouth and I say something dumb about how hard it is to have kids or whatever, something that this struggle I'm going through is so challenging, not thinking about how one of us would give anything to have a struggle like that.
Speaker D: But I also think, too, again, there's a lot of love and understanding from me on my end for you and your families and your children. I don't know what that heart is like, but I know that it's hard. Do you know what I mean? I think that it's not offensive to me. I choose not to be offended by that because hard is hard. Right? We've talked about this before. Like, a trial is a trial. Hard is hard regardless of the context of the trial or the hardness, the feelings and the pain is real, regardless.
Speaker C: I love how you said, I choose not to be offended because I think that that is another key of our friendship. It's like that we choose on purpose not to. Right. Because as soon as we allow ourselves to be offended and don't work through it, then we separate ourselves from one another.
Speaker D: Right.
Speaker C: And so then it's like, instead of working through and being like, I'm going to choose on purpose not to be offended by what somebody says, we have to curate a life where we're never around people that might offend us, which is so much harder than just managing our thinking around it.
Speaker B: Yeah, I agree. It's a choice because you're human and I'm human, and we just say dumb things sometimes. I love thinking that and you hear this a lot, but that we have so much more in common than we have different so even though you're going through different trials or have different life experiences, it doesn't mean that you can't have empathy for that and understand how that would feel if you were in their shoes. I think you can feel it almost as much as people that you love and are invested in. And we always see that too. When someone close to us is hurting and you have no control to fix, like, it almost hurts you more.
Speaker D: Totally.
Speaker C: As you were talking to Chelsea, I was just like, we can all relate to feelings. Like, I might not have been sad about the same things that you've been sad about or that Lynn has been sad about, but I know what it feels like to feel deep sadness, and so I can connect with you. Like and I don't even have to say, like, I don't have to be like, oh, I felt the sadness too. Let me tell you about the time I felt sad. Although I think we give each other so much grace when we do that, but it can just be like, I know what it feels like to be sad or scared or afraid.
Speaker B: Yeah. There's a fine line, right, in acknowledging that you have felt it, too, and being a one upper. I think we're really good at not one upping. It's not fun to be friends with people who are one uppers who just share a worse story if you don't know what a one upper is. I could introduce you to a few people. But right. Sharing you share something that's hard for you and then the person is like, oh, I went through something just as hard, probably harder. Let me tell you about that. It doesn't help. It is helpful, though, for someone to say, I have felt sad like that too. Let me be sad with you. Yeah.
Speaker C: Tell me more.
Speaker B: Yeah, you don't have to tell your story.
Speaker D: Right. But I would say that that is a normal human behavior to kind of do that. And so I think you have to retrain yourself sometimes in those situations to be maybe recognized if you did one up right. And just learn a different way of connecting. Does that make any sense? Yeah, I love that.
Speaker C: Forgive yourself when you do.
Speaker D: Yeah, for sure. Because we're totally human, and we do yes.
Speaker B: Like, literally. I remember a couple weeks ago, Sarah told a story, and I think you were pretty upset on Marco Polo. And I was like, listen, I know I'm one upping right now. Like, I called it out, and I said, but this has happened to me. And and we were able to maybe you didn't feel that, but we were able to connect through our trial. Rather than me just not recognizing that I was trying to one up you, I just acknowledge it like, hey, I can connect with you here because of this in my life.
Speaker C: No, I love that.
Speaker D: Yeah.
Speaker C: And at that point, I was like, tell me more about your experience, because I want to stop thinking about mine. Right. So it's not like there's this formula of how to do it or how to not, but when you're loving people and showing yourself and them grace, then it's easier to help one another.
Speaker D: And I think, again, when the goal is just connection, I think that there's no hierarchy of like, oh, my life is harder than your life, and you have no idea of what this that's not true connection. Right. When you really just want to connect and love people for who they are, I feel like even when you do one up, it's like, with the goal of connecting or sharing or yeah, Lynn.
Speaker B: I just wrote that down. I take notes a lot when I'm doing this, but I just wrote that down. Just love her for who she is. Like, if you want to connect with someone, just love them for who they are. Right.
Speaker C: Then I think that takes practice and that we can practice on ourselves, too. Like, as you're saying that, I'm like, oh, yeah, when you practice loving yourself for who you are, it translates.
Speaker D: And I was just thinking to you, we have all done so much work on ourselves, right? We have all done so much work on ourselves, and a healthier relationship with who we are personally, I think, allows for genuine connection. You know what I mean? There's just more love there to just flow. I don't know.
Speaker C: I agree.
Speaker D: Well, I think. Yeah.
Speaker C: I don't know if you would call it, like, emotional intelligence or what, but I don't ever go into a conversation with either of you thinking like, I better be careful about I don't want to offend them or I don't want them to get upset by not that that could never happen, but that I recognize that if it did, that we could work it out and that we are all committed to taking radical responsibility for our own lives.
Speaker D: Yeah. There's no expectation that we're friends with each other. For you guys, I don't expect you to make me feel better, but it's.
Speaker B: Great when you do make me.
Speaker D: It's, like, amazing, and then it just naturally happens, right?
Speaker C: Yeah.
Speaker B: But you feel better, I think because you have that open, vulnerable you're being your true self. You're accepting and loving yourself in this relationship. So of course you're going to feel better when you're able to express that something else. Last thing. This has all been great and amazing and lovey dovey and beautiful, but something else that I think we are really good at is kind of calling each other out sometimes.
Speaker D: Josie, you're super good at this.
Speaker B: To a am I'm a very blunt person? It's my superpower being blunt, positive or negative. But I do think we allow each other to be in the sadness and there is the time that it switches and we're like, okay, now what do you want to do about it? What do you want to do? Do you want to stay sad or are we ready? Let me know when you're ready and then I'll tell you how to dig yourself out of this pit.
Speaker D: I've been coached by both of you for different things and I just think for me, not being a coach, but having both of you, our friendships and just everything I've learned from you, the benefit of your way of thinking has changed me. I don't know if it's profound and so it's interesting. When I do go to with other friendships and stuff, I'm always like, Sarah, I used to do this to you all the time. I'm like, so and so. You need to talk to, you know, like, she will change your way of thinking. She will change your yeah. It's just like just who you both are and just the way that you live your lives and present yourselves is an amazing gift in a friendship, but it's awesome and I don't know, I just want to convey that to other people to carry that forward.
Speaker B: And do you think you don't I'm.
Speaker D: Not as good as you guys, but it's more natural, like, in our friendship, just the way that you guys you know what I mean? It's more natural to be open and to call each other out and it's not always so natural like in other friendships, which is interesting to me.
Speaker C: Yeah.
Speaker B: I think that comes from us being vulnerable too, though, right. And choosing not to be offended and all the things we've talked about, investing the time and prioritizing one another there. It shapes your relationship.
Speaker C: Definitely beautiful.
Speaker B: Any last thoughts, ladies? Any last thoughts that stand out to you about friendships and what we've created here?
Speaker C: I think if I could tell the listeners one thing, it would just be like, this is possible for you too. And the first step is just to believe that it is and to just look for it.
Speaker D: I think I would just share. Just put yourself out there, even if it feels uncomfortable, if you feel awkward, if you feel weird, if you feel like you're not. For me, I don't feel like I'm a naturally friendly person. Chelsea, you're just, like, friends with everybody. You're such a good friend. And I feel like that's not a natural quality that I have, but it's one that I've been developing, and I feel like I have developed, and I continue to develop. But put yourself out there and just allow for the awkwardness. But it's so worth it. It's just so worth it.
Speaker B: I love that, Lynn. I think that's perfect to end on. It is so worth, um we see the fruits of our labors, this hard work that this friendship is no. Sometimes it's hard, sometimes it's easy. But having the opportunity to create these relationships is so worth it. So thank you guys. Thank you so much for being here. You're awesome. Talk to you minutes on Marco polo.
Speaker D: Love you guys.
Speaker C: Love you, too.