Jul 12, 2021
S
God and wife most important relationships, but God wants us to
invest in other relationships as well, in particular other
men. Jesus demonstrated this in how he invested in his 12
disciples but was closest to 3, Peter James and John, and you might
say the closest was John.
The Bible is filled with wonderful stories of how people
relate to each other and how we should do the same (Elijah/Elisha,
David/Jonathan)-anyone think of others?
I put out a podcast called Christian Men at Work, and I'd
thought I'd borrow from some of my interviews for this topic.
From David Smith "Who's Got Your Back" interview (have a copy
if you want to borrow it):
- "Guys tend to form alliances more than friendships, it's toxic in a lot of ways"
- "There should be some people in your life that you should be close to"
- "Biblical masculinity shows a warmth and lovingness"
- "A friend is a person with whom one can be sincere" - Ralph Waldo Emerson
- "It's the individuals we're close to that make life worth living"
- "A friend is one of the nicest things you can have and one of the best things you can be"
- "It's not about frequency"
- "The answer to 'who's got your back' is the one whose back you've got"
- "Are you a host or a guest" when you walk in a room?
- "I learn that when I listen to someone, not only am I learning, it shows respect"
- We have 4 communication skills, reading, writing, and speaking but we don't focus enough on listening
- "Women are more holistic, they look at the total person..women don't have these macho expectations, they're more attentive to the relationship...there's a covenant...that I value you and I care for you"
- Jefferson and Adams
reached out to each other late in life to make amends, most guys
don't do that - side note - we should take that first step for past
relationships that were damaged for whatever reason (neglect,
offense)
"Blessed are the peacemakers,
For they shall be called sons of God." - Matt 5:9"18 Now the fruit of righteousness is sown in peace by those who make peace." - James 3:18 - So we should make
peace, and we should forgive others (can't control if they will
forgive) - Matt 6:14-15 "14 “For if you forgive men their
trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive
you. 15 But if you do not forgive men their
trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses." Matt
18:34-35 "34 And his master was angry, and delivered him to
the torturers until he should pay all that was due to him.
35 “So My heavenly Father also will do to you if each of you, from his heart, does not forgive his brother [a]his trespasses.”" Mark 11:25-26 "25 “And whenever you stand praying, if you have anything against anyone, forgive him, that your Father in heaven may also forgive you your trespasses. 26 [a]But if you do not forgive, neither will your Father in heaven forgive your trespasses.”"
- "The concept of total independence leads to loneliness and sadness...and an earlier grave"
- Important elements of a friendship include listening, self-disclosure, compromise, loyalty
Dave Brown
Isolation disconnects you from the family of God
This has been exaggerated by Covid-19
Can lead to pornography and boredom
When we're together we have a enriched and enlivened life with
each other, and we're encouraged to be accountable, to be
responsible, to take up our cross daily, to die to self, and follow
Jesus
We are called to remember what we already know, what God has
done and His promises and who I am in Christ, our identity comes
from Yeshua not from anyone or anywhere else
I would add that another relationship in addition to
friendships that should be a part of our lives as Christian men is
mentorship, be a mentor and be mentored, Paul/Timothy
Also, value our brothers in Christ, arguably more than
relatives,
Mark 3:32-34 "
32 And a multitude was sitting around Him; and they said to Him, “Look, Your mother and Your brothers [a]are outside seeking You.”
33 But He answered them, saying, “Who is My mother, or My brothers?” 34 And He looked around in a circle at those who sat about Him, and said, “Here are My mother and My brothers!"
Prov 18:24 "A man who
has friends [a]must
himself be friendly,
But there is a friend who sticks closer than a
brother."
Prov 27:17 "As iron sharpens iron, So a man sharpens the countenance of his friend."
Blood is thicker than water
Matt 7:6 "“Do not give what is holy to the dogs; nor cast
your pearls before swine, lest they trample them
under their feet, and turn and tear you in pieces."
Mark 6:10-11 "10 Also He said to them, “In whatever
place you enter a house, stay there till you depart from that
place. 11 And [a]whoever
will not receive you nor hear you, when you depart from
there, shake off the dust under your feet as a testimony
against them. [b]Assuredly,
I say to you, it will be more tolerable for Sodom and Gomorrah in
the day of judgment than for that city!”"
In person vs internet
Quality over quantity (social media)
Believers and non (different purpose)
Zones
Pressure to group us and put us against each other based on
race, political beliefs I’m going to suggest you forget about those
man-made categories and think of these zones:
Work
Church
Neighborhood
|
E
Smile and listen
L
Exhort bondservants to be obedient to their own
masters, to be well pleasing in all things, not answering back, not
pilfering, but showing all good fidelity, that they may adorn the
doctrine of God our Savior in all things.
A
H
|
John Shirey
-
Each evening plan 2 or 3 things you want to accomplish the next day